The Hugh Freeze Dating Service

Making millions but you're lonely because you are in insufferable prick? Ever tried getting a burner and calling escorts? If it works for Hugh Freeze, maybe it will work for you too? Be like Hugh, don't be afraid to go for it regardless of the situation! Just beware as the phone may not end up as your only burner.

• 100% ring-spun cotton

This product is made custom for you as soon as you place an order, which is why it takes us about a week to deliver it to you. Making products on demand instead of in bulk helps reduce overproduction, so thank you for making thoughtful purchasing decisions!

Size guide